The monthly money date: a 30-minute agenda
A short, regular, friendly check-in keeps you both on the same page, and turns money from a source of arguments into something you plan together. Pick a day each month, make it pleasant, and follow this agenda.
- 5 min
Start with a win
Each of you names one good money moment since last time, however small.
- 10 min
Look back
Shared spending last month: anything surprising? Any bills that went up?
- 5 min
Check the jars
Progress on shared goals and the emergency fund.
- 5 min
Look ahead
Birthdays, trips, repairs, renewals and anything else coming up in the next two months.
- 5 min
One change
Agree on one thing to try or change before the next date. Write it down.
Conversation starters
- What's one thing we spent money on this month that was really worth it?
- Is there a bill or subscription we could cut or renegotiate?
- What are you looking forward to that will cost money?
- Is anything about money stressing you out right now?
- Are we still happy with how we split shared costs?
- What would make next month feel easier?
- What goal should we put a little extra toward?
- Is there something you'd like to learn about our finances?
Ground rules that help
- Keep it short. Thirty minutes is enough.
- No blame for past spending. Focus on what comes next.
- If it gets heated, pause and pick it up next time.
- Have the numbers ready, so you're not searching for them together.
New to talking about money? Start with the first real money talk.